Grandfather at the Bar

So I guess I will tell another “ghost” story. This one is much more happy and upbeat compared to my other sharing on this topic. This memory was from a time when I was working for the night life, in fact that is what I did through my whole twenties was go out drinking and trying to have as much fun as possible to keep the depression and boredom with life at bay, but this is a whole other story.

So I am with my roommate at a bar hanging out with a girl he is trying to get with and her friend. We had only been there a short while but were already getting along great and having a good time. So I guess that is why I had the courage to ask her what I did.

I am sitting there at the table, the four of us talking like crazy carrying on multiple conversations all at the same time in true socially lubricated fashion. Out of the corner of my eye I see this guy sitting alone staring at us. At this point in my life I was often irritated when people watched me. In fact it would so irritate me that I would get angry about it. There was obviously a lot of work I had to do around that but I feel a lot of it was about wanting to hide in fact the alcohol was a big part of hiding. So I see this guy looking over at us but as soon as I turn my head to look directly at him there is no one there. This happens a couple of times until I decide to just watch out of the corner of my eye without moving my head the next time I see him.

He was wearing a black leather jacket with a pint of beer in front of him just smiling this very warm, genuine, calm smile. It totally disarmed any anger I had about being watched and any fear I might have felt about what was going down. I realized he wasn’t concerned about me at all but was looking at the girl my friend took us there to meet.

This was just too weird how strongly I could see him, so after a while I finally just came out and said to her, “This is going to sound crazy but there is a guy over there, that isn’t really there, that is just looking at you with a big huge smile.” I shit you not, this woman doesn’t skip a beat and tells me flat out, “Oh that is my grandfather. Other people have told me the same thing”. I told her “yeah but he looks young” to which she replied “Yeah, they said the same thing”. She goes on to tell me more about him including that he used to like to drink.

This experience totally blew my mind since this happened way before the incident on the boat (Sleep Apnea or Something Else? post) and at this time I was still trying to figure out what was going on in the world and why I saw and believed things so strongly that so many people thought were crazy or total nonsense.

This was one of my direct confirmations that I wasn’t crazy and that it wasn’t just in my mind. One could argue that she was just playing with a drunk seeing things but I had just started drinking and believe me I had a huge tolerance to alcohol back then. Also, that wasn’t the mood, in fact just before I told her what I saw it became very quiet at the table like a space opened up for this communication to happen. There was no laughter or weird looks from my roommate or the other girl, which was probably the weirdest occurrence since that is rarely the case when one rubs up against a belief system.

We all continued to hang out that whole night and had a great time. I didn’t see him at all the rest of the night but I imagine even to this day he comes and checks in on her from time to time making sure she is safe and enjoying her life.

May you always feel the love of your ancestors around you,


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